Ever since I was a kid, I have struggled to make decisions.
Still to this day, I am reminded that I was the six year old who would stand at the bakery for 20 minutes debating about whether I wanted a chocolate or glazed donut.
I am also not a fan of pros and cons lists. That’s because regardless of which list ends up being longer, there are some factors that hold higher importance than others.
For example, if you’re trying to decide where to go on vacation and the pros are; good food, low prices, and friendly locals and the one con is that the week you plan to go has a high chance of storms for days, that will most likely outweigh all of the positives.
The reason decisions are a challenge for me is because I am very affected by regret.
Although there are very few things I regret in life, things I do end up regretting take a while for me to get over.
Not long ago, I was listening to a podcast that really struck a chord with me and I plan to use this strategy from now on whether decisions are big or small.
The term is called Regret Minimalization.
The truth is that no matter what, there is almost always going to be a drawback to a decision.
Whether that’s expenses, weather, living conditions, people, language barrier, distance, very few times in life is a situation perfect.
What’s amazing though is that often times when we make the right decision, everything feels like paradise so the shortcomings don’t weigh us down. They’re there, but not in a way where we constantly have them on our minds. Life is beautiful that way!
It’s as straightforward as it sounds and relies heavily on intuition. What is something you’re currently going back and forth in your mind about?
-Relocating to another state?
-Taking a hiatus to see other parts of the world?
-Selling everything you have and downsizing to a motorhome?
-Investing thousands into that course that your soul has been calling for forever now?
The list could go on forever, but the debate in your mind can’t.
So next time you are pondering a decision, ask yourself. Which choice am I least likely to regret? It may not come easy, but it will feel peaceful.
I encourage you not to overthink the decision, however it’s more than ok if you need to write down your thoughts and the possible regrets you may have.
Something I have been pondering lately is whether or not I want to leave the United States and experience life in an unfamiliar territory for a while. I imagine myself living in the Jungle near a beach.
Waking up in the mornings to see gratitude offerings of plants, fruits, and vegetables on peoples doorsteps instead of people rushing out the door and pressuring the barista to make their drink as quickly as possible so they are not late to work.
I picture being of service, like helping other women find their true callings, teaching English to those who want to learn, or working on a ranch with sweet animals. I could spend hours in cafes and coffee shops people watching and observing the culture; at the end of my days, my ❤ would be so full.
The second thing I have been pondering is whether or not to hire a life/business coach. I have so many ideas and while I am pursuing them through my blog and art, there is something I don’t know yet that only a coach could teach me. I know that if I want big results, I need to make big changes and take big risks, but the huge financial investment intimidates me.
I didn’t ask to be this way and by way I mean a gypsy soul with a higher calling that involves the road less traveled. It’s more challenging and less secure, nobody wants that.
I could wait a few years before diving right into the unknown and have much more in the bank.
However, if in a year from now I don’t want to be feeling the same dissatisfaction that I feel today, that in itself would be a regret. My heart desires change now and I’m not going to live forever.
Blindly, these two decisions feel incredibly difficult, but when I think of them in terms of regret minimization, the answer is crystal clear.
Why do I tell you this? Because whatever it is that your heart desires and your soul is calling for, you didn’t ask for either.
It’s in you DNA, it’s part of your existence, therefore there is no reason to feel guilty or question if there is something off about you.
It just is, you just are.
With that, I encourage you to block out time for yourself and to find a serene, sacred space to do some soul searching.
Make sure you are not pressed for time or around anyone who will influence your decision.
Be clear on exactly what options you have, ask yourself; Which decision will give me the least amount of regret? Then let your intuition do the rest and your answer will come. And so it is…<3